NEEDTOVENT EXCLUSIVE!!!

This photo of Ms. Ann Coulter was taken during the "Evening Gown Competition" at the MISS HOLOCAUST BEAUTY PAGENT being held this weekend in beautiful Butte, Montana. Thus far Ann of Green Gabble has faired rather poorly at this prestigious event, coming in last in the "Miss Congeniality" voting and third from the bottom among women with no bottoms in the "Swimsuit Competition."

Final results will be announced later today after the "Talent Competition." No announcement has been made regarding what Ms. Coulter is planning other than we do know for certain that her mouth will be the primary orifice being utilized and swallowing may be involved as well.

One last comment: Officials with the MISS HOLOCAUST BEAUTY PAGENT had originally selected once-bucolic Bulverde, Texas as the site for this year's event. However, an advance scouting party discovered that the Comal County Courthouse building was simply too reminiscent of the Reichstag to have these women come and compete. This decision was made a little more difficult when, at the last minute, the Comal County Chamber of Kommandants offered free strudel and a leisurely afternoon of toobing the Guadalupe River at no cost for all participants.