SKANKY

Being a highly respected and established Producer of feature-length motion pictures -- I'm especially revered in Bulgaria -- I receive scores of photographs from upcoming actors and actresses hoping to be cast in my next epic. Every once in awhile I receive a photo that catches my eye...

The photograph above is purportedly that of Osama bin Laden's niece. It jumped out among all others because it can surely serve as the "poster child" for the work SKANKY. That's a funny word -- skanky -- one that is exceedingly hard to define verbally. As with a rare handful of other words, skanky is simply something you will know when you see it.

The good news is that this eligible bachelorette, in true Islamic tradition, remains a virgin. On the other end (literally) she must now wear a Size 42 Butt Plug, al a Allah's abidance.

For those of you unfamiliar with the sizing of said devices let me just say that a Size 42 Butt Plug requies as much rubber in its manufacture as the spare tire for a Honda Civic. That's skanky, indeed.

An aside: Allegations have surfaced recently that Americans are prejudiced towards sand niggers. That's poppycock. I know I'm not an Arabophobic and I bet you aren't either.