Wednesday, January 14, 2009

PINHEADED PETAPHILES


(Ashley Byrne, PETA Campaign Coordinator, Takes The Stage To Announce A Major New Public Relations Endeavor)

Yes, there are many among us who belive that the organization known as People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (aka PETA) is a bit wacky, but the latest announcement of a campaign to have us refer to fish as sea kittens is nothing short of being absurd.

Yes, "Sea Kittens" is the new term now being used by PETA for the creatures they assume are in dire need of an image makeover.

According to Ms. Byrne, PETA believes that by renaming "fish" compassionate people who would never dream of hurting a dog or a cat might extend that sympathy to a dapper young snapper, or should I say sea kitten?

Byrne went on to say that rebranding fish as sea kittens was obvious.

"Fish not only have the same ability to feel pain as a dog or a cat, but they also communicate with one another. They have complex social interactions; they form bonds; they express affection by gently rubbing against one another."


The PETA campaign boasts a colorful, interactive Web site aimed at children and their parents. It offers sea kitten bedtime stories and a design-your-own sea kitten in hopes it will build compassion in families.

As a final argument for this new campaign, Ms. Byrne stated, "Most parents would never dream of spending a weekend torturing kittens for fun with their families, but hooking a sea kitten through the mouth and dragging her through the water is the same as hooking a kitten through the mouth and dragging her behind your car."

So far PETA has only promoted the campaign in North Carolina, but plans to take it nationwide soon.


You know, I don't think that we at Needtovent.com are the only ones who think PETA is stupid.

7 Comments:

At 7:27 AM, Anonymous mrn said...

makes me want to go out and eat some gill netted dolphin....ooops, i mean gill netted sea kittens....mrn

 
At 1:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Do Sea Kittens purrrr?
Mew5

 
At 2:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

so now we have to order all-you-can-eat fried sea kitten instead of cat fish....sheeeesh!!!!

 
At 2:31 PM, Anonymous Charlie the Tuna said...

I've been eating cat fish most of my life and no problems, so I guess I could get used to calling the others Sea Kittens as long as that doesn't change the flavor.

 
At 8:35 AM, Anonymous Cap'n Ahab said...

Let's see-that would be Sea Bass Sea Kitten, Amberjack Sea Kitten, Wahoo Sea Kitten, Red Snapper Sea Kitten; yeah, Avast, me hearties....I could do that.

 
At 8:43 PM, Anonymous Rodney T said...

If they want to start calling Birds Sky Puppies, I am out of here.

 
At 4:26 PM, Anonymous Flu-Bird said...

PETA are a bunch of stupid annoying hippy cunts trying to force its rediculous ideas on us all we should have absolutly nothing to do with PETA and its stupid ideas

 

Post a Comment

<< Home